I am a man who suffered trauma at a young age. However, I didn’t realize that the circumstances

of my early life influences my behavior as an adult man. Feelings and attitudes about life were

ordered in my brain when I felt rejection and lack of care and comfort. My desire as a young boy

was to have my fathers love. It was not there, and my mother was not available to comfort me as

I needed. I learned to depend on my self and things that would bring me relief and help me feel

good about myself. I loved music, art and cloths. But at an early age pornography was shown to

me. The human body and hoping to look like the men in the magazines became an idol that I

worshiped and it caused me not to feel good about myself. My masculine identity was wounded.

My recovery is a long story including same sex attraction, adulty and sexual addiction. But there

is healing and freedom.

I have seen grace and mercy in my life story. I am married and have adult children. God has been

merciful and we are still a family. You can restore your life, but you need help. You cannot do it

on your own.